Current...Past...Sin...Alexander...Forum...Notes...Survey...D-land

Dispelled Apprehension
2002-10-13 - 1:50 p.m.

After I waited a short while with Ella, Adhemar came upstairs and stood before us.

"Arnon� Can I� talk to you?" he asked slowly.

I looked over to Ella in question, and she nodded.

"I will be downstairs, Sindor," Ella stated.

I nodded and watched her stand up and walk down to the main floor.

Adhemar sat down across from me where Ella had been sitting before. He looked more solemn than usual, and I felt slightly guilty for having put him in such a state.

"Arnon�" he began. "Please, understand� I really� love Henmi. I've been thinking about him ever since we left for Paris. He feels the same, too."

I lowered my eyes and stared at the table, wondering what I should say.

"Please, don't be angry, Arnon," Adhemar pleaded.

"I'm not angry," I corrected. "I'm� scared."

"Why, kid?" he asked.

"Because you� you have never loved anyone in the time that I've known you. You've been with so many, and yet you feel no love for them. How can I know if you're even capable of love?" I asked. "And how will I be sure that you will stop� sleeping with someone different every night? If Henmi found out you were still doing that, he would be really hurt!"

"I will never hurt him!" Adhemar said fiercely. "I do love him! You have always told me to help you counsel Henmi, practically forcing me to be affectionate to him. Just look how happy he is now! If I hadn't been there for him, he would still be depressed! Now, I swear to you, I will never hurt him! I care for him too much for that!"

Sighing, I laid my head down on my arms. I wanted to believe Adhemar, but the older brother in me was still skeptical.

Adhemar reached over and put his hand on my arm. "I promise you, Arnon. I love him. He's very important to me."

I nodded into my arms, praying that he was telling the truth. I sat up and took Adhemar's hand in mine. "Be good to him, then," I said simply.

"I promise you, I will always," he answered.

I released his hand and continued. "But what does he think about you being a vampire?"

"He doesn't mind, Arnon," he replied.

"But what if he asks you to�?"

"I don't know, Arnon," he answered. "What would you do?"

"I don't know either," I replied truthfully. "He would be miserable. He would hate it, having to kill people."

"Yes, I suppose," Adhemar agreed. "But we would be miserable without him."

"I don't want him to get old and die, Adhemar," I admitted. "I don't want to lose him."

"I don't either," Adhemar stated. "What will we do, then?"

"I don't know�" I answered again. "If we do it--"

"You should do it--"

"No, he likes you more--"

"He's your brother!"

"He's your lover!" I said, exasperated.

"I can't, Arnon; he's too innocent," Adhemar said.

"It has to be you, Adhemar."

"Arnon!"

"C'mon, Adhemar!" I urged.

"He'll hate me for it!" Adhemar replied.

"Then let's ask Ella to do it," I suggested.

"Oh, that will go over well."

"Okay, maybe not, but�" I sighed. "Let's just think more before we do anything."

"Agreed." He nodded.

"Oh� I should talk to Henmi, too," I remembered. "Is he upset?"

"A little, kid," Adhemar answered. "He thinks you're mad at him."

"I'm not mad at him�" I answered. "Gods, how could I ever be mad at him?"

"Then you have to tell him that," Adhemar replied. "I'll call him up here."

"Thanks, Adhemar." I smiled at him.

He smiled back and stood up. "He'll be up in a moment, then." Ruffling my hair as he went by, Adhemar walked downstairs to retrieve Henmi.

A moment later, Henmi walked slowly up the stairs alone, and over to the table where I was sitting. His expression was saddened.

"Sin?" he said. "Please don't be mad� I really--"

I stood up and hugged him tightly, cutting his speech off. "I'm not mad at you at all!" I told him. "I know you love Adhemar, and that's all right. I love you, and I want you to be happy."

"Sin�" he hugged me back. "Thank you, Sin� I'm so happy you're not angry."

After a moment, I pulled away and looked at his face. He was overjoyed, so much more so than he had been of late.

"Do you really love him, Henmi?" I asked him.

"I� do, Sin. Really," he answered.

"Good," I answered. "Stay with him, then."

"Sin?"

"I mean it," I stated.

"Sin�" he hugged me closer again. "Thank you, Sin."

I released him a moment later and said, "Let's go back downstairs."

He nodded in agreement, so we walked downstairs together. Adhemar and Ella were sitting down at a table talking together, so we walked over to them.

Adhemar stood up and offered his chair to me. "Sit, Arnon. I have to help my lovely with the bar." He smiled at Henmi, and Henmi returned the gesture.

I nodded and sat down across from Ella as Henmi and Adhemar went back to working.

Ella and I talked for a few hours, and then Adhemar came and joined us later. We waited longer still, but Alexander still didn't return. I was beginning to worry a few hours before sunrise.

"Do not worry, Sindor," Ella told me. "I am sure he will be back soon."

"He told me he would return, but it's been so long�" I said. "I'm really worried."

About an hour before sunrise, we all decided that we should go back to the house. I told Ella and Adhemar that I would wait for Alexander, so they climbed into their coffins without me.

Soon after, Alexander did return. I was relieved that he was finally back, but deeply concerned when I saw the state of his appearance.

His shirt was slashed in several places, and blood trickled steadily out of a wound on his arm.

He told me that he just needed sleep, so I helped him into our coffin, and climbed in beside him. I hoped he was right, and that the wounds would heal overnight. I was so scared, so worried about his health, that I did not care at all about his outing to our future house.

I kissed him and hugged him gently, trying to avoid touching his wounds. I was terribly worried about him, and I was near tears praying to whatever deity would listen that he would be all right in the morning. I would never be able to live with myself if anything ever happened to him.

The next evening, I woke up much earlier than usual, desperate to know the condition of Alexander's health.

I flung the lid off of our coffin and turned to Alexander, noticing that Adhemar and Ella had not risen yet. "Alexander? Lex? Lex, wake up!" I shook him gently.

After a moment, his eyes fluttered open slowly, and he said groggily, "What is it, love?"

Without asking his permission, I pulled him forward and removed his shirt hastily. I looked over his upper body where all the blood splotches has been on his stomach and arm last night. Thankfully, his wounds had closed up and healed entirely.

I sighed in relief and laid back down with him in our coffin, hugging him closely. "I was so scared�" I told him. "I was scared that you'd�" I trailed off.

Alexander turned to me and kissed my forehead. "Vampires cannot die, my love. You should not have worried."

"I couldn�t help it," I stated. "You were bleeding all over� It was horrid."

"I am fine now, Sindor. The tenants of the house were violent, that is all," Alexander answered.

"What happened?"

"I discovered that the two tenants were murderous. They attacked me, so I had no choice but to defend myself. I drained them both and left them in the house."

"You left them there? What if someone finds them?" I asked nervously.

"I am sure no one would have come there. Besides, I took the keys," Alexander answered.

"Alright�" I snuggled closer. "But what about your shirt, Alexander? It's torn and stained with blood�"

"Well, I am sure I have another in the bedroom," he answered. "Would you like to accompany me?"

I smiled and nodded, following him out of our coffin and into his bedroom.

*All the rights to Sindor (the graphics and text included) belong to Leah Jenner. No reproduction or republication without written permission.